Coming Home.

It was 2010, the year of the tiger.

I was learning that beauty wasn’t something you can paint on, buy at a store, or starve yourself enough to get.

I was learning about the grace that lives in every body. It was an awkward year with lots of new experiences, and stepping out of my comfort zone (which to be honest, was never very comfortable). I somehow ended up in the cover of magazine that year, and it was weird 15 minutes of fame. But, that’s a whole other story.

That is also the year that I had this dream:

There was a dog, a golden retriever, she was on some epic quest to come home. She was walking backwards, and she was wearing a collar around her neck that had some kind of homing device on it. She was tired and hungry, her body was weary from the journey, but her heart was steady.

Because of the collar, she didn’t have to worry about whether or not she’d make it home. She just had to keep going. No giving up until she got there.

I was waiting for her. I was standing outside of my childhood home, and here she comes. This beautiful, thirsty, hungry, and loyal dog, walking backwards to our home. She arrived right in front of my house, on the sidewalk, and collapses. She exhales. I feel an overwhelming mix of sorrow, joy, grief, relief, and knowing.

Here we are.

I woke up, and I knew.

No matter how far away we travel, no matter how hungry, how lost, and how lonely we feel, we are coming home.

We don’t need to know the way, because the way is carrying us. We are walking backwards. We can’t see where we’re going, we can only see where we’ve been.

I love the words of Joseph Campbell: “If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it's not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That's why it's your path.”

Home is on the inside. Everything we do is bringing us closer to ourselves. All we ever need to do, is keep going.

Love, Marni